Meet the New Boss, Part 4

The Daily NK claims to have obtained an “exclusive” of a propaganda tract with a quote by Kim Jong Il praising Kim Jong Eun:

Entitled “Youth Captain, Comrade Kim Jong Eun Is another Mt. Baekdu Style Great Man to Whom Chosun Has Given Birth,” the material expands enthusiastically on Kim Jong Eun’s outstanding abilities and extraordinary personality in every field, quoting Kim Jong Il on a number of topics related to his son.

For example, Kim Jong Il is quoted in the material as saying, “The Captain has been assisting me with lots of my work. I have been achieving good results in the Central Committee of the Party since I was 22 years old, but our Captain is also doing well, and is the most respectful to me.

“I was moved to tears when I saw how he took care of my health and security. His mind to think of me is full of sincerity,” Kim added.

Kim also praised last year’s fireworks as being the work of Jong Eun, as reported by The Daily NK last week, saying, “The Youth Captain showed his exceptional ability by producing the entire program of fireworks and songs. He stayed up several nights in order to prepare the fireworks. This is his extraordinary and notable ability.

He added, “By doing so, his loyalty to the leader was instilled deeply.

Insert mandatory claims of improbable martial skill and paternal fealty:

He also spoke highly of Jong Eun’s marksmanship saying, “Our Captain has fired a gun very well ever since he was three years old. Not even soldiers with a high accuracy rate can shoot better than him.

Furthermore, “Kim Jong Eun is the no.1 guard who escorted Kim Jong Il and who decided to become a faithful soldier able to emulate just one ten millionth of our comrade and Supreme Commander’s greatness and make our strong military an invincible one for the future.

He also emerged from the womb fully potty trained and bowled a perfect game at at the tender age of five months (using a 15-pound ball, too!). Oddly enough, there was no apparent mention of his stellar stewardship of North Korea’s financial or agricultural systems.